Rough Script

TUESDAY 28 JUNE

Narrative

Acts:

I – Introduction, II – Lifestyle, III – Shopping, IV - Closing Thoughts, V – Edit

I – Introduction

a.     Opening of door, protagonist sprawled in bed covered in oxidized lettuce (Cuddling picture frame)

“No! No! No! What are you doing here? Your not suppose to be filming yet! I haven’t had my two hours of beauty sleep yet. And I’m not ready! Moron.”

b.     Monologue personal introduction after being woken up.

“VOICEOVER: My name is Andrej. I’m a model.”

c.     Protagonist shows film crew around room and setting.

Andrej looks at his shrine. He is also holding his picture frame (which he carries everywhere)  “Oh your fabulous darling”

Andrej watches himself on Youtube. “Oh honey! (Referring to himself on the catwalk)…..Oh Jesus I’m looking fat there.” Andrej then directs speech to the cameraman.  Stop shooting! Stop shooting! Make sure you cut that out okay?

d.     Expressions of alienation from society, reclusion, denial of stagnant social values, general aloofness and ranting of narcissism.

Andrej speaks to camera whilst nibbling on lettuce. “Some people think I’m a freak. But I think it’s just that my beauty scares people. My friends understand me. I know I can count on them.

Andrej talks to his imaginary friends – the posters on the wall with cutout faces of himself on everybody. “You guys are boring me. I’m going shopping.” Andrej holds his picture frame.

II – Lifestyle

e.     Exercise routine.

Andrej does yoga in his apartment in hot pants and a sweatband. “VOICEOVER: Oh everybody does yoga! If you want to look like this its all about the yoga and the lettuce.”

f.      Diet and maintenance: fridge full of lettuce, eating

Andrej opens his fridge, stacked full of lettuces.

Andrej eats lettuce like it is a delicacy at a table next to his friends. His picture frame is sitting on the other chair. Directs speech to one of the poster friends on the adjacent wall:  “Wow honey, your looking fabulous! Have you been eating less or barfing more?”

Andrej feeds his dog lettuce. “You’re looking a little fat Andrej. You’re only getting half a piece today.” Andrej places half a piece of lettuce in the dog bowl.

Andrej binges on lettuce.

g.     Throwing up montage, self scolding.

“VOICEOVER: its no secret. We all stick our fingers down our throats.” Andrej throws up due to binge out on lettuce. “So fat!”

We see a bucket near his bed that is there purely for his vomit sessions.

h.     Make up and posing with various outfits.

Andrej does make-up routine. Applies mascara and white eyebrows. “VOICEOVER: People say I’m naturally beautiful. I know I am already beautiful. But ugly people wear make-up to look more beautiful. So there’s nothing to stop me from doing the same.

Andrej poses for the camera. Shots are fast and jumpy and go with music to accentuate this. “VOICEOVER: I probably spend about three hours each day working on my poses. It’s actually quite a good exercise routine as well.

III – Shopping.

i.      Walking across Westfield in drag.

“VOICEOVER: It is hard for me to walk down the street without being so noticed. Everyone is like Andrej! Andrej!”. Andrej walks through shopping centre. He is still carrying his picture frame. Gets close to camera and directs speech to cameraman – “See those people staring. And over there.” (Points to random shoppers)…”wait do you hear that? Yep, I think they’re screaming my name” (shot looks at random shoppers. No one is screaming his name; he just receives strange stares CRICKET NOISE)

j.      I love shoes monologue, trying on shoes

“Oh my god, Shoes!” Andrej walks into a shoe shop and tries on shoes. The cameraman is holding the picture frame. Asks shop assistant for a size 8 shoe. Whispers to cameraman: “Do you think he realises who I am?” Quickly taps sales assistant and directs speech quietly: “Um, I’m sorry do you know who I am?” Sales assistant looks confused. Andrej directs speech to cameraman again: “Quick hand me that” (picture frame) Directs speech to sales assistant again: “This is me. I’m Andrej. You know, Andre Pejic? I’m like a fabulous international model. You don’t know who I am?” Sales assistant looks at Andrej and cameraman disdainfully. Ignores Andre and goes to get size 8 shoes.

Andre puts on a women’s size 8. They do not fit him but Andrej is so delusional he believes it is the perfect fit. Directs speech to cameraman. “Oh my god, fabulous!” Poses around ridiculously.

k.     Staff laughing behind separating wall

IV – Closing Thoughts.

l.      Shopping bags, and reflection on day

m.   Eating, discipline self-deprecation (damage of the protagonist).

n.     Closing thoughts lengthy montage

o.     Leaving exit.